Authenticity in the Workplace Echo Chamber

Diana Rivers

Hey everyone, welcome back to The H2H Experiment! I’m Diana Rivers, and as always, I’m joined by my partner in all things human experience, Joao. How’s it going, Joao?

Joao

Hey Diana! I’m good, I’m good. Super excited for today’s topic. I think it’s one of those things everyone feels but nobody really talks about, you know?

Diana Rivers

Exactly! So today, we’re diving into the messy reality behind that shiny corporate promise: “Bring your whole self to work.” I mean, it sounds so inviting, right? But, let’s be honest, there’s usually a big ol’ asterisk at the end of that sentence.

Joao

Yeah, like, “Bring your whole self… as long as it fits the mold.” I see this all the time, especially in big organizations. There’s this unspoken line you’re not supposed to cross, even if nobody ever says it out loud.

Diana Rivers

Totally. And, you know, I remember early in my career, I had this big pitch meeting. I was so nervous about sounding “too American,” so I actually practiced smoothing out my accent. Isn’t that wild? I mean, I was literally editing myself before I even walked in the room.

Joao

That’s so relatable, Diana. I think everyone’s got a version of that story. So today, we’re gonna unpack why this happens, what it costs us, and what we can actually do about it. Ready?

Joao

Let’s do it!

Diana Rivers

So, let’s start with the big, beautiful lie. “Bring your whole self to work.” It’s everywhere—on the walls, in the onboarding slides, in those glossy recruitment videos. But, like, how often is it actually true?

Joao

Yeah, I mean, it’s almost like a marketing slogan, right? But the reality is, people figure out pretty quickly what’s really acceptable. There are all these unspoken rules—like, you can be yourself, but maybe don’t talk about your politics, or your tattoos, or, I don’t know, your real salary.

Diana Rivers

Or even just, like, how you dress or the way you speak. I’ve seen people hide parts of themselves just to fit in. And it’s not always obvious. Sometimes it’s just a look someone gives you, or a joke that falls flat, and you realize, “Okay, maybe not that part of me.”

Joao

Exactly. And it’s not just about big things. Sometimes it’s the little stuff—like, you learn not to challenge the boss in meetings, or you avoid bringing up certain topics because you know it’ll make people uncomfortable. It’s like there’s this invisible fence around what’s “safe.”

Diana Rivers

Yeah, and the crazy part is, nobody ever writes these rules down. You just… pick them up. It’s like osmosis. And before you know it, you’re playing by them, even if you don’t agree with them.

Joao

So, here’s where it gets interesting. We call it authenticity, but what we really mean is, like, sanitized individuality. You can be yourself, but only the parts that don’t rock the boat. I see this a lot in Italy, actually. I have a friend who is a huge football fan, but he never talked about his team at work because it was the “wrong” team for that office. He just… hid it. It sounds silly, but it’s real.

Diana Rivers

Oh, totally. And it’s not just sports. I mean, I know people who cover up tattoos, or never mention their real opinions on, say, company strategy, because they don’t want to be “that person.” It’s like, “Be yourself! But, you know, maybe not too much.”

Joao

Yeah, and it’s like being at a dinner party where you’re told, “Just be yourself! But don’t talk about anything that might make people uncomfortable.” So, what’s left? You end up with this version of yourself that’s… safe, but not really you.

Diana Rivers

And that’s the paradox, right? Organizations say they want authenticity, but only if it doesn’t challenge the harmony or the brand. So, people start to self-censor, and that’s where things start to unravel.

Joao

Let’s talk about self-censorship. It usually starts small—a joke you don’t tell, an idea you keep to yourself. But over time, it becomes a habit. And then, it’s not just editing, it’s performing. You’re playing a role, not being yourself.

Joao

And the scary part is, after a while, you don’t even notice you’re doing it. It’s like, you start to forget what’s real and what’s just… the work version of you. And that’s exhausting. It erodes trust, too, because everyone senses that gap between what’s said and what’s actually safe to say.

Diana Rivers

Exactly. And it’s not just about big, dramatic moments. Sometimes it’s as subtle as nodding along in a meeting when you actually disagree, or laughing at a joke you don’t find funny. It chips away at engagement, and honestly, it just makes work feel… fake.

Joao

And when everyone’s doing it, you end up with a culture where nobody really knows what’s true anymore. It’s like, “Are we all just pretending?”

Joao

This is where Erving Goffman’s idea of the “work face” comes in. We put on this mask at work, and it’s not just about hiding ourselves—it’s about managing what we say to people in power. Feedback gets filtered. Leaders hear what people think they want to hear, not what they need to hear.

Diana Rivers

Oh, I’ve seen this firsthand. I worked with a leader once who only ever heard good news. Everyone was so afraid to tell her the truth that, when a project finally failed, she was completely blindsided. She thought silence meant everything was fine, but really, it was just… fear in a nice suit.

Joao

Yeah, and the higher you go, the thicker that filter gets. People start managing impressions instead of sharing reality. Leaders end up in this echo chamber, and they don’t even realize it’s happening because it feels so… comfortable.

Diana Rivers

And that’s dangerous, because when feedback is curated, leaders make decisions based on half-truths. It’s like trying to drive with a foggy windshield—you’re gonna miss something important.

Diana Rivers

So, what happens when authenticity and honest feedback both get stifled? You get this perfect storm where innovation just… dies. People kill their own ideas before they even share them, because they know it’s not safe.

Joao

Yeah, and the psychological toll is huge. People get exhausted, stressed, and disengaged. I read about this company—let’s call it Company Y—where they lost some of their best talent because leadership dismissed honest feedback about the culture. People just stopped caring, and eventually, they left.

Diana Rivers

And it’s not just about losing talent. When people are pretending all day, it’s draining. Trust erodes, engagement drops, and creativity just… withers. It’s not a communication issue; it’s a human experience crisis.

Joao

Yeah, the human spirit doesn’t thrive in an echo chamber. It shrinks. And that’s the real cost.

Joao

So, why don’t leaders see this happening? Most of them genuinely believe their door is open, their culture is transparent, and people feel safe. But power changes the flow of truth. People in lower-power positions are always calculating the risks before they speak up.

Diana Rivers

Totally. I mean, leaders often mistake the absence of conflict for the presence of trust. They see nodding heads and think, “Great, everyone’s on board!” But really, people are just protecting themselves. Compliance isn’t the same as engagement.

Joao

Exactly. So, how can leaders become more aware of these dynamics? I think it starts with recognizing that silence isn’t always a good sign. Sometimes, it’s the biggest red flag of all.

Diana Rivers

And being willing to ask the hard questions, even if the answers are uncomfortable. That’s where real change starts.

Diana Rivers

Let’s flip it to the employee side. Every day, people are running this internal cost-benefit analysis: “If I say this, will I look uncommitted? Will disagreeing with my boss hurt my career? If I show my real values, will I be labeled ‘difficult’?”

Joao

Indeed, neuroscience supports this. Social pain—like exclusion or rejection—activates the same brain regions as physical pain. So when authenticity feels unsafe, your brain literally interprets it as a threat. That’s why these cultures feel so draining.

Diana Rivers

And I think everyone’s had that moment where you wanted to speak up, but you just… didn’t. Joao, have you ever held back something you wanted to say?

Joao

Oh, for sure. There was this time with a manager—I really disagreed with a decision, but I just kept quiet. I told myself it wasn’t worth the risk. Looking back, I wish I’d said something, but I get why I didn’t. It’s self-protection.

Diana Rivers

And that brings us to our H2H Experiment of the Week: “Truth Without Armor.”

Joao

Yeah! So, if you’re a leader, ask for honest feedback—like, really honest. No defending, no explaining. And if you’re a team member, share one truth you’ve been holding back, but do it constructively. Then, reflect on what you learned and how it felt to show up a little more real.

Diana Rivers

We’d love to hear your stories, too. Share your experiences with us—what happened when you tried this? What surprised you?

Joao

So, how do we break the cycle? It’s not just about telling people to “be brave” or “speak up.” That puts all the pressure on individuals, and it doesn’t fix the system. It’s two-way work: leaders have to make authenticity and feedback safe, and employees can test that safety.

Joao

You know, leaders can start by asking dangerous questions, like, “What am I doing that makes it hard to tell me the truth?” And when someone shares a hard truth, reward that dissent publicly. Show that candor is valued, not punished.

Diana Rivers

And model imperfection! Share your own mistakes. If the boss can be human, others will risk being human, too. For employees, start small—share a safe truth, pair candor with care, and keep track of what happens. Over time, you’ll see patterns and maybe even progress.

Joao

Teams can also build routines—like regular “truth check-ins” or making space for dissent in meetings. It doesn’t have to be huge. Even small changes can make a big difference in building trust and honesty.

Diana Rivers

Yeah, it’s about creating a culture where people feel safe to be real, and where leaders actually want to hear the truth—even when it’s uncomfortable.

Joao

Alright, let’s wrap up. Today, we unpacked the gap between the promise of authenticity and the reality of self-censorship at work. We talked about the hidden costs—like lost innovation, eroded trust, and that exhausting feeling of pretending all day.

Joao

We also looked at why leaders miss the warning signs, how employees weigh the risks, and what both sides can do to break the cycle. Remember, our H2H Experiment of the Week is “Truth Without Armor”—try it out, and let us know what you discover.

Diana Rivers

And hey, if you want more, check out our videos on YouTube and our articles on LinkedIn and the European Customer Experience Organization. We love hearing from you, so keep those stories coming!

Joao

Thanks for listening, everyone. Diana, as always, it’s a pleasure.

Diana Rivers

Right back at you, Joao. See you all next time on The H2H Experiment. Take care and keep it real!

Joao

Keep being human and keep experimenting! Ciao, everyone!