Episode 6: Whispers Within | How Your Inner Stories Craft Your Life

Diana Rivers

Welcome back, everyone, to another episode of The H2H Experiment! We are so glad to have you here with us today. You know, Joao, I was thinking—this podcast is really becoming like our own little shared story, right?

Joao

Oh yeah, that’s true, Diana. Each episode adds a chapter. And today’s? It’s one I think everyone will find deeply personal and also pretty eye-opening. We’re exploring the stories we tell ourselves.

Diana Rivers

Oooh, yes! But not just the ones we, like, consciously make up. I mean those sneaky little narratives our brains spin in the background without us even realizing.

Joao

Exactly. These mental stories—big and small—shape how we see ourselves, others, and the world around us. And sometimes, they’re as dramatic as a soap opera without us even knowing it.

Diana Rivers

But without the fun plot twists.... But seriously, understanding these stories is huge. Whether you’re trying to build a business, improve relationships, or just, like, figure yourself out—tapping into this can change everything.

Joao

It can. So today, we’re diving deep into why our brains create these narratives, how they mix emotions with reality, and—most importantly—what that means for us in our daily lives.

Diana Rivers

Ooh, I love it already. So let’s jump in!

Joao

...You know... Isn’t it fascinating how our brains act like these full-time storytellers? They take fragments of what we call "reality", stir in some emotions, toss in assumptions, and suddenly—bam!—we have this whole version of the world that might not even be accurate.

Joao

It’s almost like the brain runs its own production studio. Antonio Damasio, a neuroscientist, talks about how emotions aren’t just this extra layer—they fundamentally guide what we choose to believe or do. Like, without them, decision-making pretty much breaks down.

Diana Rivers

Oh, totally. And, I mean, we don’t even realize half the time how much our feelings are steering the ship. It’s like they’re the sneaky executive producers of our mental movies.

Joao

Exactly. Daniel Kahneman’s research highlights this too—our brain loves quick fixes. It fills in gaps with whatever feels right intuitively, even if it’s wrong. That’s why we often jump to conclusions that aren’t based on facts.

Diana Rivers

Oh, wait, I have a perfect example of this! So, a few weeks ago, my coworker sent me this super vague email, something like, "We need to talk about that report." I instantly went into total panic mode, thinking, "Uh oh, I messed something up big time." I started spinning all these worst-case scenarios.

Joao

Oh man, I can see where this is going.

Diana Rivers

Right?! Turns out, all he wanted was to, like, brainstorm ideas for the next section. No big deal at all. I completely overthought it because my brain decided to turn his three-sentence email into a whole disaster script.

Joao

That’s such a good example, Diana. It’s incredible how ambiguity triggers the fear center in our brain—the amygdala. Suddenly, our mind jumps to survival mode, filling in blanks with worst-case scenarios.

Diana Rivers

Oh, 100%. And the kicker? Once you believe that story, it changes how you act. Your body tenses up, you get snappy—it’s a ripple effect.

Joao

Exactly. And left unchecked, those narratives can really shape how we think about ourselves and others, often inaccurately. That’s why awareness is so critical.

Diana Rivers

That’s so true, Joao. And thinking about it, workplaces are perfect examples of this—these mini social ecosystems where the tiniest bit of ambiguity can snowball into full-blown drama.

Joao

Absolutely. It’s almost like tossing a pebble into a pond—the ripples spread fast. Brené Brown says it best: “In the absence of data, we will always make up stories.” And honestly, most of them end up being worst-case scenarios, right?

Diana Rivers

Oh, totally. Like, how many times have we all turned a little restructuring meeting into, “Okay, they’re laying off half the company.” I mean, come on!

Joao

Exactly! Here’s a story that might resonate. I once worked with a company where the management announced a “strategic pivot”—that was literally the whole message. Just two words, no details. As you might imagine, people panicked. Rumors started flying—everything from “we’re cutting departments” to “we’re selling the company.”

Diana Rivers

Ugh, I can feel the tension just hearing that. So, what happened?

Joao

Well, it got bad. People were stressed, morale tanked, and productivity took a hit. All that uncertainty was breeding anxiety. Turns out, the strategy was just to shift marketing efforts to digital platforms—nothing extreme at all. But without clear communication, they handed that storytelling power over to the rumor mill.

Diana Rivers

And that’s the thing, right? Once a story like that takes hold, it’s almost impossible to reel it back in.

Joao

Exactly. Gossip thrives in the gaps left by unclear communication. It’s why leaders need to be radically transparent—because ambiguity fuels those distorted stories.

Diana Rivers

Yep, it’s like storytelling judo—you need to cut off the gossip before it gathers strength. Fill in the gaps, or someone else will.

Diana Rivers

You mentioned how leaders need to fill in the communication gaps to stop distorted stories from taking hold. But how do they actually do that? I mean, it’s one thing to say it, but putting it into practice seems a whole lot trickier, right?

Joao

Absolutely, Diana. The core technique here is something called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT. It's a psychological method that, put simply, teaches you to recognize when your thoughts are distorted. Then you challenge those distortions with facts.

Diana Rivers

Ooh, yeah, like when your brain starts writing a thriller, you kinda go, “Wait a second. Is this really true, or is this just my brain being extra?”

Joao

Exactly. One of my favorite CBT techniques is to actually write it down—like take a specific thought, analyze whether it’s fact-based or assumption-based, and then rewrite it constructively.

Diana Rivers

Oh, I like that. You’re basically becoming the editor-in-chief of your mental stories!

Joao

Spot on. And here’s where psychology gets fascinating: these stories aren’t just affecting you in the moment. Concepts like the Rashomon effect and confirmation bias show how our personal lens can completely distort reality.

Diana Rivers

Wait, the Ra-what effect? Sounds like something out of a sci-fi movie!

Joao

Right? I know, it does. The Rashomon effect is named after the Japanese film. It’s when different people remember or interpret the same event in totally contradictory ways. Because we all have our own narrative filters.

Diana Rivers

Oh, that’s so true, especially at work! Like when two teams are debating who really dropped the ball on a project—it’s always, “Well, my side of the story is clearly correct.”

Joao

Yep, and that’s where confirmation bias sneaks in. It’s our tendency to seek out only the evidence that aligns with what we already believe. It’s like, once you buy into a story, you stick to it—and ignore anything that challenges it.

Diana Rivers

Ugh, yes! And then that story just snowballs. Which, honestly, reminds me of that workplace misunderstanding we talked about earlier. Should we break that down, step-by-step style?

Joao

Great idea. Let’s look at it. The first step was identifying the story. In your case, it was, “Oh no, my coworker thinks I messed up.” That’s the initial narrative your brain created out of ambiguity.

Diana Rivers

Totally. And, honestly, part of me knew it wasn’t rational, but it still, like, took over, you know?

Joao

Right. That’s normal. Then the second step—you challenged it. You paused and asked, “Wait, what do I actually know for sure here?”

Diana Rivers

Yeah! And I realized the only fact I had was a vague email with no real context. Everything else was just assumptions I’d made up.

Joao

Exactly. And after you reframed it—when you rewrote the “story” with neutral language that avoided catastrophizing—it allowed you to approach your coworker calmly. That shifted everything.

Diana Rivers

Honestly, it was like flipping a switch. I chose curiosity over fear, and it turned out there was nothing to stress about in the first place. Wild how that works, right?

Joao

It’s a great example of how even small narrative shifts can transform outcomes. When you start becoming aware of these patterns, you don’t just react—you respond with intention.

Diana Rivers

You’re so right, Joao. It’s amazing how those small narrative shifts can make such a big difference. Thinking back on everything we’ve unpacked—from sneaky brain narratives to how they play out in the workplace—it all ties back to that conscious shift, doesn’t it?

Joao

Absolutely. And let’s not forget the tools we shared for taking back control of those narratives. Like using cognitive behavioral techniques to challenge distorted thoughts, or practicing radical transparency to cut gossip off at the source. It’s all about staying intentional.

Diana Rivers

Totally. And of course, that ripple effect we talked about—the way these little shifts in mindset can lead to big changes, not just for us personally, but in our teams and businesses too. Honestly, it’s just so empowering.

Joao

It really is. If there’s one takeaway from today, it’s that we’re not just passive participants in the stories of our lives—we’re the storytellers. And when we own that, it transforms everything.

Diana Rivers

Preach, Joao! I love that. Well, this has been such a great conversation, and I really hope our listeners feel as inspired as I do right now. And hey, if you enjoyed today’s episode as much as we enjoyed making it, don’t forget to check out more of what we’re up to.

Joao

That’s right! You can find our thoughts, articles, and more discussions like this on LinkedIn, and we’ve also got some great videos on YouTube. So, make sure to subscribe and follow us there too.

Diana Rivers

Yes, come hang out with us online! And as always, thank you so much for listening and being part of The H2H Experiment. You guys are the reason we love doing what we do!

Joao

Until next time, stay curious, stay aware, and keep experimenting.

Diana Rivers

Bye for now, everyone!